I'm Just A Human

I'm sorry if i was rude,
i didn't mean to,
i really didn't.

i want us to be normal,
maybe not like we used to,
but just like normal people.

but i think it's not possible,
not now,
my mind, heart, and pride won't let me,
see.. i told you i'm self-centered.

i have to give myself a time to grieve,
this wound won't heal in one blink.

so could you please stay away from me for a while,
cause these memory haven't fade away just yet.

one thing i know now,
I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me,
and relationship don't always have to work.

you can think what you want,
that i'm egoistic and childish?
i don't care.
I'm not perfect,
i'm just human,
i have my flaws.

-IAmJustHuman-

Begoo!!!

Gw baru saja melakukan suatu hal yang sangat bodoh, dungu,
dan berpotensi menyebabkan gw menderita malu yang teramat besar..

seriously,,
gila,
gila,
gila,
bego...!

..
.
.

hhh... tarik nafas..
buang,,



oke think.
what's the worst thing that could happen?
ehm,, beside i'll be the talked of the society,
i'll lose my face in front of some people,
i also potentially will be embarrassed for a looong time..

HAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

b*doh.
dung*.
t*lol.

dudulllll!!!

-begobegobegobegobego-

let the time do the talking..

he's not ready for another relationship..

that's it,
that's the words that i think best describe what happened..
it took me 1 night to think that 1 sentence..

am i right? or am i not?
i don't know.
i really don't.

the soundtrack of my morning today is "Life Goes On" by LeAnn Rimes
"Oh life goes on, and it's only gonna make me strong.."

But then my friend came to visit, and we talked, heart to heart.
she said to follow my heart.
and now i'm not sure about what i feel.
i'm not sure about anything.

i wish life as simple as one-two-three or a-b-c,
i wish i could just say "ah tau ah" and walk away,

.
.
.
hhh...
God, please guide my way, thank You..

now only time could tell, what will this be.
oh i wish the process isn't going to be hurt.


-BlankMind-

Oh well,,

oh well,,
i always pray for the best to happen
apparently this is the best for now
according to You, God,
so what can I say?

All i want to do is grateful because i have You in my life,
You that Keep me from crumble and fall into pieces
You that Gave me this amazing maturity and calmness i don't even know i had
You that Allow me to experienced this journey
You, Who Know what's best for me..
You, God...
Alhamdulillahirabbilalamin..

HasbiAllahu laa ilaa ha illa huwa 'alaihi tawakkaltu
Cukuplah Allah bagiku, tiada Tuhan selain Dia.
Hanya kepada-Nya aku bertawakkal

i'm grateful because i have the most amazing friends in the world
that keep me so close together so i don't have space to crack up

i'm even grateful because i have the imperfect family
that taught me what to do in crisis
that taught me that there's better things than break down and cry

what happened?
oh well,,
let's just say,
what i've always afraid just happened

this is why i keep us out of the spotlight at the first place,
this is why i only tell few people, and i even regret it now,
this is why i always hesitate to respond when you said those three words..

i can't say "i didn't see this coming" because i saw it, clearly.
what i don't know is,,
is that you saw it too..

what i regret is,
why you still did this,
why you didn't tell me you were hesitate too,
so that i could be more confident about my feeling,
more confident to said "no" at the first place,
and maybe i could help prevent all of this from happening

cause it's not fun,
it maybe what's best,
but it's not fun.

to tell you the truth,
i can't say that i put my faith on us,
i can't say that you're the one,,
but i thought it was just temporary,
that my feeling would change along time,

oh well,,
apparently not.
as far as i know for now.

oh well..
now i'm grateful that i trusted my feeling not to tell everyone
cause now there's only few people to be delivered the bad news to.
it's still too many tough.

yaiks..

-ohwell..-

A great friend is..

the one who do not laugh when his/her friend asks a stupid question...





thanks for answering and for not laughing, mate..

-It'sNiceToHaveAFriend-

Be Polite (And Mean It) Please...

Mungkin udah pada tahu, salah satu cara untuk memiliki perilaku terpuji adalah dengan membiasakan diri mengucapkan "3 magic words", yaitu maaf, terima kasih, dan tolong..

Memang sudah cukup banyak yang melakukan itu,
mengucap 3 kata sakti tsb,, tapi kadang terlihat sangat "palsu",, ngerti ga?
Jadi ngucap, sekedar ngomong aja, he/she doesn't really mean it..

And sometimes it bothers me..

Ini bukan postingan pertama gw yang membahas ttg orang yang mengatakan sesuatu yang tidak dia mengerti, yang bukan sebenarnya yang dia rasakan, dengan kata lain, tidak jujur.

Dan gw cuman pengen ngasih tau dan memperingatkan aja,,
.
.
It shows...

Kelihatan lho, kalo lo ngomong sesuatu yang lo ga bener2 ngerti, yang lo ga bener2 rasain,,
dan di mata orang lain, itu tidak akan berdampak baik..
and sometimes it could also hurts,, ouch..




Anyway,, gw lagi kesel dengan orang2 yang mengatakan 3 kata sakti tsb,
but doesn't really mean it..

Pernah menjumpai atau bahkan memakai kata2 ini:
"Sori"
"Trims"
"Plis"
etc,, (the 3 magic words slang)?


Ehm, Let me tell you something...
.
.
.
Those are not even real words!


Okay, maybe those words still could be used in spoken conversation, but please,,
DO NOT use those words in written conv,,
use a real word ,,
and yes, that includes on SMS

Cause it just doesn't feel right,, it feels phony and like you didn't mean it..

What on earth is the word "Sori"?
you can say "Sorry", or even "Maaf",,
but "Sori"?? Nooo....
you're apologizing to someone, and you're not even using a real word..
please..

And "Trims"?
There's "Thanks" as an abbreviation of "Thank you"
but there's no "Trims",,
and no, it's not acceptable as an abbreviation of "Terima kasih"..
just say/write "Thank you" or "Terima kasih" like a real polite person do..

And what more could i say about "Plis"?
You could just say/write "Please" or "Tolong",
you're asking for help here,, the least you can do is being polite..

Just so everyone know,
I used those words,, back then, when i was young (halah, sok tua :) )
when i still have my over-the-top ego,,

Honestly, I didn't feel like i was being raised in a polite environment,
my parent's hardly say those three magic words when i was a child,
well, now they do, but it's kinda late don't you think? But it's ok,,

So i learned it from outside the house,
First I know it's theoretically right to say those words,
but (maybe because i didn't used to hear people say it)
it's hard to start doing it myself..
I felt like i was too good to say that stuff,
yeah right, who was i?

But now i know, it's nice to be polite,
it doesn't make you less respected,
it even increase you're self esteem..
And plus,, it helps make the world a better place

So..
unless you're a teenager with a raging hormones
and you're saying that stuff to other teenager,
please, do not use those words..

If you want to be treated like a mature and polite human being,,
than be one, be the real one and mean it

-It'sKillingMe-

setelah sekian kali mencoba pijet...

gw masih ga ngeliat dimana enaknya dipijet..
.
.
.
don't get me wrong,
I mean, yeah, pegel2 emang ilang sih.. dikit.. :)

Tapi gw ga ngrasa satisfaction kyk orang2 lain
yang kyknya menikmati sekali dipijet..

Belakangan ini gw mengalami pegel yang berkepanjangan di daerah punggung,
dicurigai karena membawa beban berat dalam jangka waktu lama (yea, emang kuli si :D)
it's been more than 1 week, and i've been to 2 different places for massage,
and it's not working..

yeah, mungkin gw nya yang salah tempat kali ya,,

yang pertama gw ke suatu salon - he, ya, gw tau, emang tempatnya salah, hehe-
and ended up having a beauty massage -you know, with sauna service and stuff-
yang sama sekali ga menghilangkan pegel,
malah kulit gw jadi licin, tau deh, mau digoreng kali gw.. hehe..

Trus selang seminggu kemudian, gw manggil tukang pijet ke rumah,
ini atas saran nyokap gw,, tukang pijetnya dipanggil "nenek".
Oyea, "nenek" ini emang mijetnya jago, kenceng banget tangannya,
.
.
.
tapi,, it's bit too hard for me i guess,
yang ada badan gw malah jadi sakit2 smua.. >.< hua!!

oya, plus, neneknya mungkin lagi lalai potong kuku,
jadi ada bbrapa bagian di badan gw yang lecet2 gt deh kena kuku beliau,,

bottom line, gw malah babak belur :)

Haaaa......

padahal orang2 bilang gw jago mijit,
tapi kan gw ga bisa mijit diri sendiri, huhu,,
gimana ya?

Ada saran?
.
.
.
Maybe i should go to "Bersih Sehat" at the first place.. hmph.
enak ga sih dsana?




err... tapi kyknya masih lama deh,
tubuh gw butuh "pemulihan" dulu dari babak belur ini :D


-BuatAnakKokCobaCoba:)-

Iseng

Tegoda dengan hasil tesnya si nyt




hehe..



mm.. maxudnya apa ya? hehe..


Addictive content in my personality is 71%

Beware!!! people easily get addicted to me

Lets101 Quizzes - Blog Quizzes

-hmm-

Ehm..
I really don't know what to say,
I just hope this is gonna last,
with God's permission..

Just so you know, I pray for us,
hope you too..

and please, be true, be honest, don't ever lie..
'key?

Oh ya, yes, i do had a good time today :D

-HappyAndScaredAtTheSameTime-

Saya Sakit.. (Huhuhu...)

Saya sedang dalam perjalanan liburan ke Bali selama 5 hari,
dan pada hari ke tiga saya sakit.. huhu..

Pusing, badan lemes, dan tenggorokan sakit..
Sebel, jadi ngrepotin orang, apalagi nyokap sudah balik duluan..

Selama sakit, saya sempat berpikir bahwa
saya memiliki kesempatan untuk meninggalkan ibadah,
dengan dalih "Ah saya kan sedang sakit, Tuhan pasti mengerti"
walaupun sebenarnya saya masih mampu untuk beribadah

Namun lalu saya berpikir,
apakah dengan tidak beribadah,
lalu saya berpeluang lebih besar untuk sembuh?
Tidak.
Malah peluang saya untuk sembuh semakin kecil,
dengan mengurangi kemungkinan kesediaan Tuhan untuk menyembuhkan saya,
dengan menyia-yiakan kesempatan untuk menambah kadar keimanan saya,
pada akhirnya, saya yang akan rugi kan?

Akhirnya saya memutuskan untuk tetap melaksanakan ibadah,
paling tidak berniat untuk melaksanakan ibadah,
dan Alhamdulillah, Tuhan memang Maha Mengetahui dan Maha Kuasa,,
keadaan saya membaik, walau belum sembuh benar..

Dan beberapa waktu kemudian, saya memetik hikmah dari sakitnya saya..
Pertama, saya "dipaksa" untuk beristirahat cukup,
memang, selama perjalanan itu,
saya seperti lupa kalau tubuh saya punya batas,
kalau tubuh saya perlu istirahat,
mungkin karena terlalu excited ya,, he,,
Jadi, dengan sakit itu, saya disadarkan kembali bahwa
"hei, badanmu itu bisa capek lho nak,," :)

Kedua, saya "dipaksa" untuk menjaga makanan & minuman;

Saya "dipaksa" makan lebih sehat;
berhubung sakitnya saya menyinggung tenggorokan, jadi makan saya harus dijaga,
saya jadi hanya boleh makan makanan yang berkuah2 dan tidak banyak bumbunya,,
walhasil selama sakit saya makan nasi + sayur saja, kurang sehat apa coba? hehe

lalu saya "dipaksa" makan secukupnya;
yah, namanya tenggorokan sakit, kan ga enak makan banyak2,
lalu saya tersadar, selama disana memang saya makan agak berlebih,
(yah berhubung liburan,, he.. tapi ternyata itu
tidak bisa menjadi pembenaran akan kerakusan saya :) )

Dan saya "dipaksa" memperbanyak minum;
disana saya memang kurang minum,
yang ini saya punya cerita sendiri,
kan tenggorokan saya memang agak sensitif,
jadi seharusnya minum air hangat,
jangan air dingin, dan bukan juga air "biasa", tapi, air hangat

nah berhubung disana jarang yang menjual air hangat,
(yah, namanya juga kawasan pantai, yang banyak juga jual air dingin, atau air "biasa")
saya jadi malas minum,, he,, alasan awalnya sih biar
mencegah sakit gara2 kebanyakan minum air dingin,
tapi ternyata tidak minum sama sekali juga bukan solusi,
malah bikin masalah baru (ya iyalah,, hehe,, saat itu mungkin saya kurang berpikir :) )
jadi gara2 jarang minum dan banyak kegiatan, dehidrasi lah saya,,
na dengan sakit ini, saya jadi punya alasan yang kuat untuk
meminta (atau memaksa diri untuk memperoleh) air hangat, he..

Tuh kan,, semua ada hikmahnya,
mengutip kata2 yang gw baca di majalah,
"Kita memang hanya bisa melihat rencana Tuhan setengah2,
jadi bersabarlah, Tuhan pasti menyiapkan yang terbaik buat kita"

-It'sStillBecameTheBestVacationEver-