What's Wrong With You (and Me) ?

050808 - 8:35PM



Okay, I might shoved you first at the time,
I might overly put my emotion on my words the other day,
And you might took that more deeper than i thought.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the situation.
But to be honest, that's what I felt.
I was really disappointed.

And when you shoved me back,
I tried my best not to roar,
although my mind that time said,
"This kid wants war!"
But, no, I was trying to take the higher road,
I thought, "If what I'm about to say isn't gonna fix the situation, I'd better not say a word"
so I (tried to) shut my mind and heart, trust me it ain't easy,
It almost ruined my whole day,
I might even turn my best friend down..
Damn..

Then, when I thought I cooled down,
I decided not to light the fire,
I didn't want to add some unnecessary thoughts
inside my already (felt like) overloaded mind
I tried to reach out to you,
I tried to apologize, for the sake of my sanity and our relation.
Yet, you shoved me back.
and screamed "back off"
And yes, it hurt. Ouch.

Wow, it sounds like I'm a selfish jerk,
Hix. I slipped i guess.
I'm human too.
Couldn't I make mistakes?

Now I don't know what to do.
Didn't know it would turn out like this.
Guess I'm just gonna back off like you said.
Is this my fault?
What i know is we both hurt.
I don't know what to do, honestly.
I'm so sorry for the hurt.
but I guess it's not that easy to heal..
yours and mine.

Hope God help us find a way out of this mess.
Amin.


-Ddddddaaaaammmmmnnnnnn-

are this how we going to spend the rest of our life?
hating.. well probably not hating, but not caring about each other..?

we might as well leave this one behind
and start creating a new one, a better one instead,
cause -So Help Me God- that's the idea i've been thinking of.

-SometimesIt'sBetterNotToThinkAboutThis-

Relax Time..

just watched "Made Of Honor",
though it doesn't really have enough magic
like a successful romantic comedy movie should have,,
but it still enjoyable,
specially looking at that -Oh-So-Gorgeous- Patrick Dempsey,
hehe.. ;-)

the moral of the movie was..
"The perfect man may not be the perfect one for you"
"never take anyone for granted"
and...
we should hook up with our own best friend..
.
.
.
haha, naaah, i made up that last one..
hehe.



-Relaxed-

bodoh ah..

why do i have sudden urge to have a boyfriend?



hwakakak...



stupid hormones..


-PMS-

Okey, you can sue me for this, but honestly..

.
.
.

i was actually speechless when one of my high school friend asked me this:
"Dis, di Fasilkom tuh belajar apaan sih?"

and the best words i could came out with was:
"mm.. gw juga bingung jelasinnya ni.."

he.. ngeles,
tapi bneran, gw bingung lho ngejelasinnya kalo ditanya kayak gitu
gimana ya?

mau bilang belajar matematik,,
iya juga, dasar pelajarannya emang matematik,
tapi kan ga belajar matematik murni,
if so, then the place would be called "The Faculty of Mathematics"
instead of "The Faculty of Computer Science".. ha..

dibilang belajar teknik, iya juga,
kan ada matakuliah yang ttg hardware2 gitu
*which I'm so not interested in, he
walau ga -*well, gw sih belom- "megang2" mesin secara real
tapi kan at least belajar tentang konsep suatu mesin,,
belajar nyolok2 kabel, alat ini apa gunanya, dalemnya kayak gimana,,
gitu2 bisa dibilang sejenis kayak belajar teknik dong..

dibilang belajar ngoding, bikin program,
iya banget. ini mah ga usah ditanya.
tapi kan ga all of the subjects we learnt is about programming..
bisa protes ntar orang2 yang bakatnya bukan programming..
he,, no offense...

belajar bahasa? iya sih, macem2 lagi bahasanya,
dari bahasa Indonesia - Inggris, bahasa programming,
ampe bahasa nondeterministic, he..

belajar, mm.. belajar apa lagi ya?
yang jelas yang gw rasain di Fasilkom itu diajarin mngasah logika,
cara pikir lo akan berubah jadi lebih taktis dan sistematis,
jadi bisa menyelesaikan suatu masalah dengan lebih terkonsep..
*huahahaha, apa lagi tuh :D
yah, dengan kata lain, seperti komputer..

*lha,, berarti di Fasilkom diajarin jadi komputer dong?
hehe.. iya juga sih. It's not a bad thing isn't it?
toh salah satu alasan komputer awalnya dibuat kan untuk
mengurangi kesalahan2 yang umumnya dilakukan manusia,
minimizing human error.. biar hasil suatu pekerjaan jadi bisa lebih precise.

so i guess it's definitely not a bad thing for us
to be taught to minimizing our own error..

haa..
sebenernya gampang juga sih jawabannya,
kan keliatan dari namanya; "ilmu komputer"
yah, kita diajarin ilmu komputer,
ilmu2 yang mendasari komputer,
sebuah mesin yang intinya adalah sebuah mesin menghitung (compute),
ilmu2 yang membuat dan menjaga biar kita tetep ga kalah dari komputer,,
hehe..


yap, nemu deh gw jawabannya
jadi, kalo ditanya "Di Fasilkom belajar apa sih?"
akan gw jawab "Ya belajar ilmu komputer"
atau akan gw jawab "Belajar jadi komputer"
hehe..